Source: The Telegraph 26 Sep 2013 Photo: Rex Features
It started with a cake…
Well not really. It started with a hospital appointment on 12th January 2015, when I took the afternoon off from my job as a primary school teacher to be told suddenly, and unexpectedly, that I very probably had cervical cancer. But I’ll come back to that another time.
First and foremost, I would like to introduce you to my blog: why the title, why the name, and most of all, why the blog at all.
Why ‘Baking Better’?
Source: reddit.com Image: jaylikesdominos
Good question. After attempting to do some baking as an alternative to endless Downton Abbey whilst recovering from surgery, I was suddenly struck by the similarities between my own story and Walter White from Breaking Bad.
Ways we are similar:
- teachers
- cancer
- cooking
Ways we are different:
- high school science vs. primary
- Stage 3A inoperable lung cancer vs. stage 1B operable cervical cancer
- crystal meth vs. cakes/bread/smoothies
Uncanny, right?! So after considering options such as ‘Breaking Bread’ and ‘Baking Bad’, I thought that whilst being a more tenuous pun, ‘Baking Better’ was more to the point. Where ‘Breaking Bad’ follows Walter’s cancer-driven downward spiral from science teacher to murderous, meth-cooking criminal; ‘Baking Better’ will document my recovery and journey to a ‘new normal’. Hence ‘better’ seemed more appropriate – getting better health-wise, and maybe even better at baking as a happy side effect.
Why ‘Caroline Crimson’?
Source: facemediagroup.co.uk
No, it’s not my real name – so how did I decide on it? Not, as it happens, because it sounds like some sort of Cluedo character (“it was Miss Crimson in the library with the candlestick!”), or even perhaps a burlesque dancer (or worse).
I thought that given my spookily close connections to Walter White, perhaps I too could have some sort of alliterative, colour-related pseudonym. The initials created also had significance for me (CC = Cervical Cancer).
So it only remained to Google ‘colours beginning with c’ and pick one: cyan, cerise, cornflower, chartreuse, cream, charcoal… Crimson just seemed to have the nicest ring to it.
Why write a blog at all?
Hmmm… how to answer honestly without being really boring and/or cheesy. I will go into the background in more detail in another post, but as I have mentioned, I turned to baking fairly early in my recovery in an attempt to feel useful/productive in a very contained way. Also, amassing a hoard of baked goods would encourage (force) me into asking friends and family to come over regularly and eat them – a very positive driver at a time when seeing other people sometimes seemed too much to face.
Here is what I intend ‘Baking Better’ to do:
- It will be a place to share my successes and failures (cooking lessons learnt – as a teacher I know how important it is to be very reflective at all times);
- I intend to focus on recipes that include cancer-fighting ingredients;
- As and when I can, I will write my own story: about what is happening to me; what has happened up to now; and the future as it unfolds.
And here is what I hope writing a blog will achieve:
- At the very least, documenting my cooking will give it more purpose (and me something else to focus on other than sitting and brooding);
- On a selfish level, sharing my story may help me come to terms with it myself;
- Reading my story might possibly make other people go for their smear test on time;
- Reading my story might help other people going through the same thing (as reading others’ stories has been helping me).
Well…. only time will tell!
Caroline Crimson x
